305 - Pictures

Back in the day, I could draw really well. Even from memory. Whatever cartoon I watched back then, I could draw the main character flawlessly. Most of the time through elementary and middle school, I would be drawing. During class. That's how I was introduced to the advanced program, or as it was known in the MISD, the "Gifted and Talented" program.

I would spend most of class time drawing various people. Or scenes. The teachers picked up on it, but they couldn't give any reason for me to quit since I was doing well on any tests. They assumed that I was bored in class. So they sent a letter to my parents, and they had to contact a counselor or someone. I don't remember too well.

The counselor, or whomever, suggested that I be placed in the GT program. The classes would be more difficult and move at a faster pace. So my parents agreed. I don't remember having much say in the matter.

The GT classes consisted of the 4 fundamental classes. History, English, Math, Science. I stuck with all 4 up until 8th grade. That year, I was kicked out of GT English. I got kicked out because I didn't want to do any of the assignments, and I didn't read the books. I wanted out. And it was better that way.

I wrote a play or two in high school. Plays that shouldn't be acted out in front of children, if you catch my drift. They were hilarious though. I showed them to some of my friends, and they enjoyed them. (Oh, that reminds me, I need to find the original copies. My parents might have found them. That wouldn't be cool.)

Either way, I mentioned drawing because just 20 minutes ago, I tried to draw.

I tried to draw anything that came to mind. Nothing.

I tried to draw any cartoon character. Nothing.

I tried to draw her. Nothing.

And now I realize that I'm losing talent. I've lost something that lets me express what I've felt. I'm not good at writing plays anymore, at least not as good and creative as I was. I don't know what's happening. I want it back. All of it.