448

Holy crap the Mavs won!!!!

It was a tight game, but I'm so happy right now. It's too bad there's no one here to witness it. It's probably the happiest I've been in the past two years.

447

So, as I mentioned, my thumb is messed up. Some of the bone sticks out. Not through the skin, but just like a bump. Right at the knuckle. The swelling has gone down a bit, and I'm going to see how it is tomorrow.

I broke my blue PS2 controller. I was rather angry, and that's what happens when I just lose it. I took it apart to see if I could determine what the problem was and if I could fix it. I figured out the first half, but I don't think I can fix it. I need to stop breaking things.

About the basketball I played this afternoon. The first game is when I hurt my thumb. I started the game with 7 straight points, and then my bro decided to throw his body around. My thumb hit him or the ball and it was painful enough to make me collapse to the ground. He won that one and the next. I played through because that's all I know how to do. Unless I can't walk, I'll keep playing.

Then this guy showed up. At first sight, he looked like he might be good. But when he started, it was terrible. My bro had to head back to the apartment, so I played 1 on 1 with him. I immediately saw that I was going to dominate him. So, I would go on a run of making shots, then I would let him catch up, and then I'd go back on a run. I pretty much toyed with him. I feel a little guilty for doing that, but it made the game last longer. We went to 15, win by 2, by 1s. I let him get to 14. I turned around for a second, smiled, and played with 100% effort. He couldn't do anything. Not even 5 feet away from the basket. It was fun.

{Added on around 2:30AM}

I fixed it. I fixed my PS2 controller. I'm proud of myself. It took me an hour or so, but I did it. I feel so much better.

446

My thumb is messed up again. Awesome!

Oh, if there's a way to get my evil out, this is the way.

I'll post more tonight depending on what happens.

445

Alright. I'm back in writing form.

After those two losses, I lost it. If you have never seen me pissed off, then consider yourself fortunate. And I've been pissed off since Tuesday. That's a long time to be seeing red.

Brandon, I'm sorry. You made a comment that just fueled the fire, but I shouldn't have hung up on you like that. I need to work on my short fuse.

Umm...everything else is OK I guess. Had my Spanish interview yesterday. 47 out of 50. I messed up once, but it was kind of bad. But hey, it's not a bad score. I was expecting a 40 or something.

Played some 1 on 1 with my bro on Tuesday. 3 total games. He won the first, I won the second, and he won the third. I played terribly in the first game. I was down 17 to 4 in the second. But then I started hitting my shots and used my height advantage. I'm a whole 2 inches taller. The third game was the best. At some point in the game, the score was tied at 21. We were both exhausted, but he had more energy than I did. It was our first time playing in 90 degree heat. We need to adjust. The funniest thing though is that he was real mad about the third game. I really frustrated him. I think we're going to play tomorrow afternoon. I'll need to step it up for the first and continue through the rest. I need to show that I'm the better all-around player.

The Mavs won, but it's still going to be tough. And I'm really torn because no matter what, Dallas is my team. But T-Mac is my favorite player. Real torn.

Alright, I'll post tomorrow after I play.

444

Fermin turns 20 today. No longer a teen.

443

Just some quick notes before I go to bed.

Spurs lost. Now I don't feel so bad. (Oh, how I hate the Spurs.)

I just saw an F-bomb in Anh's AIM profile. I'm in total shock. (In recovery.)

It might rain tomorrow, so I really don't want to go to class. (And I didn't!)

I have a feeling this week is going to suck. (Eh, today has been alright.)

Alright, more later. Night.

{Added on around 3:24PM}

About to go practice. My thumb still hurts, but if it doesn't bother me then I won't worry about it. Screw the doctors!

442

Today has been rough for me. I've spent most of the past 6 hours trying to vent my anger and frustration. I shouldn't have to say why but if you don't know, just look at ESPN. You'll find the answer. (I'm definitely not in the mood for discussion about this one.)

And now I'm conflicted about something music related.

I'm not into pop. And when I say pop, I mean anything you hear on your city's generic 'Hot 100' radio station. People will tell you Good Charlotte is punk, emo, or other. In my book, it's pop. The Killers are a mix of alternative and pop. Coldplay is that same mix, but much closer to pop. Lindsay Lohan, Spears, Simpson, Duff, and all of the other blondes with pitch-correcting machines are all on my 'do not listen to' list.

I was going through iTunes to find some new music. I just want to find something new. I like the search. I saw the name, Anna Nalick. I had seen it in a Best Buy ad last weekend. I wanted to know who she was and what type she sings.

Definitely pop. But something I read has stuck with me. She wrote her own stuff. Own lyrics, own music. That's impressive. So, I have to give some respect for that. And that means she deserves a listen.

It's not bad. It's actually kind of good. And this poses the problem.

I'm tempted to buy one of her songs, but it's a totally different thing for me when you look at my music collection. People would look through, get a good idea of what I like, and then BAM! What the...?!?

I bet Brandon likes her. She plays guitar. She's brunette. She's cute. She's 20.

I think she goes on the list. Right behind Avril. (The Avril that wears the dress in that "Nobody's Home" video. Not the tie-wearing Avril.)

I'm clicking "Next Blog" to find something new to read out there. No luck. Bunch of ads in the shape of blogs and people who use languages I do not understand.

Alright, that must be a sign for me to go to bed. Sleep.

441

I've rediscovered my love for strawberry soda. Specifically Fanta's. The sweetness lingers on your tongue and the bubbles just enhance the pleasure. That's right, I'm comparing soda to 'erotic comforting.' (OK, I forgot what it was called on Joey already. It was erotic something or other. But it was funny. It's a funny show.)

There's something I want to discuss. I don't know if I'll be very detailed or very vague, but I at least want to try writing something.

About my friend from Spanish who I've been pining away for. Not anymore. I realize now that I was blinded by the idea of incredibly dirty fun. While I am in college, and that's probably all I should look for, it's not what I want right now. I actually want something with meaning. She is great short-term relationship material. But I couldn't imagine bringing her home to meet my mother. My dad would say, "Wow, she's hot! Does she have a sister?" (Yes, my dad is funny like that. I'm sure he would high-five me right at the door.) My mom would look at me with her 'ok, if that's what you really want' look.

By the way, if my use of the phrase 'short-term relationship material' offends anyone out there, then tough. I don't mean to sound like 'quick fix' kind of guy. But there are some chics that I just don't see a future with. Does that mean I shouldn't consider dating them at all? No. It just means that I won't get my hopes up.

Playoffs start today! Screw the NFL Draft! I could care less. Dallas - Houston. 4:30PM Central Time. It's on.

440

Blank canvas right now. I can't see anything. Not one word.

Didn't go to any of my classes today because I had to register for next semester. Then I decided to practice my horn some more. It turns out that I will in fact be performing for Prof. Hughes. Just for a little bit, and afterwards he will critique my technique and style. Should be insightful. I'll need to kill any nervousness I may have. This doesn't happen until the last day of class, so I have time.

After much consideration, I've decided that if my thumb doesn't get better by the end of this weekend, I'm going to a doctor. I thought it was just jammed, but I'm starting to doubt my accuracy. Try this. Run your thumbnail under your index fingernail. (Wish I had a picture or diagram or something.) I can't do that. Not only does it hurt like hell, but it feels like my thumb isn't strong enough. As if I've lost all control of that motion. People, I need my thumbs. They are important.

And I leave you with one last thing before I go to bed. I don't know how accurate it is either.


OK, nevermind. I don't feel like messing with HTML right now, so I'll just type what I read.

My top three characteristics of my "dating personality profile" were:

1. Stylish
2. Wealthy / Ambitious
3. Conservative

And the top three characteristics of my "date match" were:

1. Outgoing
2. Practical
3. Sensual

I thought for sure that "romantic" would have been at the top of my list of characteristics. But it's not. It's not even in my top 10. It's not in my match's list either. Very odd. So, I don't know how valid this quiz is. But eh, I could be wrong about myself I suppose.

439

Today went well. For the most part. Kind of not feeling well. I don't know why, but I just feel like there's something wrong. It could be nothing.

Spanish then CS. Had my Horn lessons today also. They went well. I started out sounding great and hitting everything. Then I went downhill from there. But overall I feel good about my skills. I've really made up for lost time.

Something is weird about my glasses now though. I get dizzy when I'm wearing them. They got bent last weekend during the ball game. That might have something to do with it. But right now I'm trying to type without them.

It's a really odd feeling, but I feel like I could be doing something useful right now. I feel like I could be somewhere providing someone with comfort. I feel like I should be listening to someone right now. But I'm not listening to anyone. Such a waste.

OK, now I'm bored. Think I'll go to sleep.

{Added on around 11:06PM}

Oops, before I forget, there's a dream I had last night that I would like to briefly share.

I dreamt that some purple alien creatures showed up and took over Earth. Everyone had to choose between entering their building or being thrown off the Earth with a tornado. My family and I went into their building, and I saw about 500 people go the other way. Sure enough, a tornado came and threw them high into the sky. I felt like I made the right decision after that.

Inside the building were a bunch of rooms. It was like a crazy futuristic hotel. Well, we found a room and started unpacking. I left the room and decided to learn more about these aliens. There were only three. And they carried tridents. I overheard one of them say, "What do you mean we're out of power? How long do you think it will take them to find out?"

I walked back to my room with clenched fists. I grabbed what I think was a steel pipe. Or an aluminum bat. I started walking back to the aliens. I was going to kick their ass.

But then I woke up. I sat up in my bed, decided that it was a fun dream and that I wanted to get back to it. Unfortunately I didn't. Ended up starting a new, completely different dream.

I'd like to think that I would have really kicked their ass. I mean, I've never felt so angry in a dream.

And no, I don't take drugs of any kind.

438

Today has been alright. Spanish was simple and I skipped my other classes. I decided to go practice my French Horn. I have this piece that I'm working on and I really want it to be great. There's a chance I could be performing it in front of the top French Horn professor here at UT. Makes me a bit nervous, but I'll handle up on it. It's an opportunity that I need to grab.

I've been having trouble with that lately. I don't open the door when opportunity knocks. Last night this chic IMed me looking for an Audioslave. Totally random chic. She seemed cool, and I probably should have found out who she was. Alright, so I did ask her. She's a student here at UT who found me through the Facebook. I quickly found her and her picture. She's kinda cute. And she likes Audioslave, A Perfect Circle, and Radiohead. That's definitely good in my book. She offered cookies. Sweet!

My friend Anh apparently hasa bunch of admirers on Facebook. They beg her for pictures of her sexiness. I can't wait! Heh heh heh...(Alright, that laugh wasn't meant to be seedy or anything. Sorry.)

So, just a little basketball talk. Greg Anthony of ESPN is picking the Mavs to beat the Rockets. But the other guys on NBA Nation are taking Houston. What the hell?! Just two days ago they were picking them to win it all. Or at least get to the conference finals. What abunch of flip-floppers! I'm still sticking with the Mavs in 6.

Oooh, Bradley hit his first five shots and had 12 and 7 in 17 minutes. Sweet! But I still like it more when he claps his hands and the refs give him a tech. I swear, the refs have a hidden camera just on Bradley, and whenever Bradley blinks they take notice. But it's awesome. The Ticket did a bit on him with their Shawn Bradley Action Figure. Funniest thing ever.

Stopped by the convenience store on my way home. Wanted some GummiSavers. Those things are pure ecstasy. OK, maybe not. But they are damn good. I also picked up some of those Reese's Cups, but the ones that are more peanut butter than chocolate. They're having some vote thing to make a new product. I like this one. I should go vote.

I think I should do something in politics. Just to try. I hate discussing politics. But the way I could attract people from the left or right might be something to toy around with. As I said, I know how to persuade people to do something I would.

I did wake up early and get my hair cut. He did a good job. There's still some blonde left. Oh, I love the day after I get my hair cut. Chics look and make it obvious. I love it. Well, honestly, I only remember two chics staring at me. But maybe that's because they were the only ones I caught. They weren't bad either.

My thumb is still messed up. It doesn't help any that I keep hitting it against things accidentally. Like a desk, or a counter. There was a bluish-green spot for a while. I still don't think it's broken. And as long as I think that, I'm not going to a doctor.

If you haven't heard it already, listen to Queens of the Stone Age's song, Skin On Skin. It's the funniest song I have ever heard. Really. Now, if you just read the lyrics, you'll think I'm the biggest perv ever. But I'm telling you, you have to hear the way he sings it. That transforms the song from dirty to comical.

Alright, I'm going to start some homework that's due Thursday. I know, I'm actually starting and it's not the night before! Amazing.

Oh, and one last thing. My friend from Spanish Lab is at the Ashlee Simpson concert here in Austin. What should I think about that?

{Added on around 10:47PM}

My dad made a hilarious comment earlier today.

"Why can't the popes come up with an original name? If I was pope, I would name myself Ebeneezer or something."

437

I don't want to bore you all with basketball talk. I could go on and on about the greatness of it, but I will spare you all.

I'm finally over whatever it was. Allergies or something. I'm not sure.

I finally overcame my laziness and replaced my flannel sheets. It's been warm here, and flannel doesn't help.

See, that's how much things suck here. I'm talking about sheets.

Ok, fine, since Brandon wants me to mention it...

He played really well, especially when we went full court. He was the only one producing offense. The other team killed us though. They had too much energy and ran too much. I know I wasn't up for that.

Brandon, Ryan, and I played a couple of games of 25. Brandon won the first, and we quit the second early. Although, at that point, Brandon and I both had 15 and Ryan had 11 I think. Ryan has really improved. His offense is more consistent and his defense is 10 times better than the first time we played.

Brandon played just like always. Mix of driving and some long range shots. He jammed my thumb pretty bad. I sat on the ground and for a minute I thought it was broken. I moved it, so I knew it wasn't that bad. Something better be broken for me to quit playing. We finished the game.

Of course, I was playing through some really strong allergies. Tried taking Benadryll before the game. That can really mess with you. But hey, no excuses, right?

Either way, I'm hoping to post more than I have been lately. Two posts in three days is unacceptable.

Alright, I'm going to bed. I'm going to wake up early and get my haircut. I've decided that long hair isn't for me. Even mildly long hair. I'll leave some length on top though since I still have highlights in. I don't want those to disappear yet.

{Editor's Note: Yea, he said at the top that he wasn't going to talk about basketball, yet it's half of this post. Good job, FBombAndy.}

436

So, with Sac losing and the Rockets winning, it means that we will face Houston in the first round. I was really hoping this would be a second round matchup so I could get tickets for a game after my tests and one final. I'll have to see what happens now.

I like this. Yao is capable of 30 and 20, but he doesn't. The only player on the Rockets that I fear is T-Mac. But we do have a plethora of swingmen that we can throw at him. No one else on that team is going to hurt us, so I think we're fine. We are the better, deeper team. We should win. I'm predicting a 6 game series.

Denver is losing to Phoenix right now, so that means Seattle gets Sac inthe first round. This is the only way Seattle makes it to the second round. Sac lost Peja, and that means it's done.

San Antonio should get the Nuggets in the first round. That will be a series to watch. Denver has a good rotation of big men to throw at Duncan. But it's going to be interesting how each team matches up defensively. Will Bowen stick to Carmelo? Carmelo only has one move, so it seems like a waste. Who will guard Giniboli? How will Boykins factor in? Good story there.

Phoenix gets Memphis. Phoenix should win, but all the analysts say this is the one team Phoenix doesn't want. I don't know.

That gives us San Antonio and Seattle in the second round. Spurs in 5.

Dallas against Phoenix in the second round as well. I'm not going to touch that one. Not yet.

You know what? San Antonio really lucked out. They get a very easy second round matchup. Now I hope they lose in the first round. Actually, I want that anyway. I hate the Spurs.

435

So, I'm kind of late with this, but better late than never.

Rowdielou turned 26 this past Friday. Go visit her blog. (I also have it in My Links, under J's Blog.)

My bro turned 29 this past Thursday. He's quite the old man. Well, not really. Except when he complains about knee pain or whatever.

And with that, I am out.

434

So, I'm about to go to bed, but I thought I would share something with whomever.

Lab, CS class, hour lunch break, discussion section, appointment with my oncologist at 4 (where they will draw blood), probably get back home at 6. I also have to drop off a form and do a little homework. Not to mention that I have a long ass program to write this weekend. And that I don't want to go to lab. No matter how nice or fun it is, I'm tired of it. I don't want it anymore.

Don't be surprised if I don't post Friday. It's going to be a long day, and I'm betting that the first thing I do when I get home is go to sleep.

It just doesn't end. When I finally give in and laugh at my misfortune, it doesn't matter. Turning the other cheek isn't the way to go.

Such a give up.

433

I still have a sore throat, and there's some coughing now, but I will get better before tomorrow. I have to, and I want to.

I dropped off my camera at Walgreen's. Will have pictures. I don't know if I'll post any on my photo blog. We'll see.

So, I also need to do this program. It's due Sunday night. I know I'm not going to work on it on Saturday. So, I should probably work on it right now. But eh, I want to take a nap.

432

Let's see...

I missed my bus back home twice. It only runs every 20 minutes. So, that sucks.

Did I mention that I bit my lip 3 times in the same place? There's a small blister there now.

I've had a sore throat for the past 2 days, and I have no idea why. There's no other symptoms, so it's not a cold. Just a sore throat.

Oh, that guy who sat in the water, the one I hate. Yea, I saw him walking with some chic arm in arm. They kissed. Now, she wasn't a knockout or anything. But still. For a split second, I could hear a being more powerful than I snicker. But hey, it's all in good fun. I can take a joke. I still have my faith.

I finally get home, which was around 4:45PM, and I check my school email. Nothing. Good. I check my Gmail account. Two things, both from the facebook. One asks me to join some group here at UT. The other, well, I won't dive into specifics. Let's just say I really wasn't expecting anything like that.

I really want to give up.

431

So, I sat down in this chair, and I didn't look at the seat because come on, like there's going to be water there or something, right? Well, there was. And I sat down. In the water.

Ah, but it gets better.

I stood up, dropped a moderately loud F-bomb, followed it with an S-bomb, and moved the chair to another table. So, I'm sitting in my dry chair when I think, "Should I warn the person who is about to sit in it next?" I figured it depended on which person it was.

There's this guy in that class whom I hate. I mean, I really hate him. He asks questions even when he knows the answer, and it's a big waste of time. He uses 'intellectual' words too many times in a sentence, so that when you finish hearing it, he sounds extremely dumb. He likes to talk about himself and he wears socks with his sandals. While writing this, I have the sudden urge to punch someone, anyone, in the face.

So, he walks in, and I think to myself, "Oh please, if he sits there, it will sooooo cancel out what just happened to me."

He grabs the chair, doesn't look at the seat, and sits down. Roughly 10 seconds later, he stands up and says, "Oh, there's water in my seat."

Hilarious. I wanted to burst out laughing, but I knew it would be best if I controlled myself. Actually, I should have laughed really loud. I know he can't kick my ass, so what's he gonna do? And then everyone else would have laughed because it was funny.

Either way, my pants are dry, so everything is fine.

430

Still having some trouble sleeping. I usually take a 2 hour nap after I get home. But tomorrow will suck since I'm on campus until 2PM. That means I won't get home until 3PM.

As I left campus today, a mariachi band was playing by the main tower. Wasn't half bad. There was one cute chic playing violin in it. She was a bit short though. Shorter than what I prefer. I should really loosen up with my preferences.

I did have my biscuits and gravy though for breakfast. I might do it again tomorrow morning.

So, Brandon is coming down this weekend. And my sis-in-law is working this weekend. So that means plenty of free time. But it also means we'll have to play early on Saturday. That's fine with me. I'm getting used to playing under the blazing Austin sun. OK, it's only been in the mid-80s here. But I hate it. So I'm conditioning myself. Oh, I should play Wednesday or Thursday, rest until Saturday, and I should be good to go. I don't want to be sore when the time comes for me to show Brandon how much better I am now.

There's a certain someone who goes to UT-Dallas who needs to get on Facebook.

I created an iTunes account so I can legally get music. There's some stuff out there that I really want. And I'm tired of not being able to use BearShare.

The Mavs won tonight. Makes me happy. Just a few more games and then I can totally concentrate on the playoffs. I also realize that it might be possible for me to go to a game in May. If I can, I will. And I'll be sure to let certain peoples know, like people who go to UT-Arlington or commute from Dallas to Fort Worth.

OK, I'm going to put on my headphones, turn on my favorite receiver in the whole wide world, and try to pass out. (I just haven't found a receiver that outputs the same warm sound. I mean, if you ever come over to my place, you'll see what I mean. It's an aural orgasm.)

429

I think I'm going to go to bed early so I can eat breakfast on campus tomorrow. I really want some biscuits with gravy. Or I could go to Wendy's for their biscuit sandwich things. Those are good. And I'm supposed to meet with 75% of my spanish group tomorrow morning before class.

I have to admit, I'm kind of blank right now on what to write. I have things in my head, but most are things I should keep to myself just because I'm not sure who all reads this.

I've been having trouble sleeping lately. Brandon was shocked that I sent him a text at 4AM. And yes, I didn't fall asleep until 4:30AM. Like I told Brandon, I think I'm fine.

I haven't figured out why I couldn't sleep last night in particular. I was tired at 2AM. I was in bed for roughly 2 hours. Tossing and turning. I thought about what I'm doing right and what I'm doing wrong. I tried to figure out what I can do to fix it all. Hmm, maybe it was all of that thinking.

And tonight, I think I'm going to try to bore myself to sleep.

428

This is really weird.

I don't know what caused it, although I'll have to assume it stems from what I mentioned in 425.

I feel like I don't have a care in the world. I feel so indifferent to everything right now. If the world stopped spinning, I would have the calmest face.

Today just sucks. That must be it. I've only been awake 4 hours or so, but I feel like today has been horrible. I don't know. Nothing bad has happened. I don't feel sick or anything. I just feel like nothing I do today matters. I really want to do nothing all day. Just nothing.

I want to go home.

I still have a month left in this semester. But I'm burnt out. If I remember correctly, I felt this way last semester too. Right around this time.

OK, so I'm going to lay around for the next 4 hours if I can.

"I'm going upstairs to be by myself."

427

This song is the one I should have paid the most attention to off of this CD...

This Lullaby

It's only less than 2 minutes long, but it's nice while it's on.

Either way, I'm worn out. Tired. So off to bed I go.

426

Maybe I ask for too much. Maybe I expect too much.

Either way, I give up. My good intentions are being misinterpreted. Or ignored.

I don't like being ignored. I don't talk often, so I would hope people listen the few times I do talk. In the same way, I would expect my friends to accomadate me if necessary. Most of them do. I know that if I have a really tough time, or I just need to hear another person's voice, there's a handful of friends who will pick up the phone for me.

I would imagine that everyone would rather have a friend who cared too much than a friend who didn't care at all. Guess I was wrong.

Well, I'm going to just lay around for a while. Maybe I'll play some ball this afternoon. I hope so. I need to get better. Have to keep improving. But if I don't, then I'm going to waste today away.

425

Whoops, didn't get this post in on time. So, I don't have one for Friday. Oh well.

So tell me, what's wrong with this, and I'll try to find a way of explaining this without incriminating myself.

A friend of mine casually mentioned that they were going to try a drug they haven't done in some time. As a friend, I realize that it is my responsibility to watch out for this person. So, I simply asked that the person in question text me or call me tonight so I would know they were OK. My first instinct was to tell them not to even think about it, but that would seem very controlling in some fashion.

Honestly, I know how to persuade people to do something I might do. But I do not know how to persuade someone not to do something I wouldn't do.

I've had my fair share of alcohol. Maybe more than my share, and I'm paying for it now. But I have never tried any drug. And it will stay that way. I'm not curious, and I'm not interested. As far as alcohol goes, I have gone 20 months without a drink. While I do miss it, I know I'm doing fine without it.

I'm a very caring person. I do worry about people when I haven't heard from them in a while. I worry about people I haven't seen in years. And some people I worry about even if I see them everyday.

Maybe I care too much. I don't know.

{Added on around 12:22AM}

Have you ever remembered an old dream because you were about to commit those actions in reality? If you dreamed about peeling an apple, and then a year later you pick up a peeler and remember. Something like that.

I was just about to sign into AIM, but then I remembered an old dream where I signed in and a friend of mine talked to me while they were drunk or something. I just remembered. And I decided against it. So, screw you fate! Or destiny! Whichever.

424

Right now, on NBA TV, they're showing Game 6 of the Western Conference Finals. Spurs vs. Mavs. Spurs up 3 - 2 in the series.

Damn the Spurs.

If Dirk wasn't injured, Mavs would have won. Simple as that.

So, my bad wishes affected Tim Duncan with a sprained ankle. Tony Parker, you're next. Well, I need to do something about Ginobili. This one guy called me "Ginobili" because I was knocking down shots left and right. I don't like that. (On my better days, I like to be "T-Mac.")

So, cross off Duncan, next is Manu.

{Added on around 2:56PM}

I don't know why I watched. I knew it was going to make me mad. But I did analyze the meltdown, and this is what I saw. (Maybe I'm just a little biased...)

Finley had one turnover, followed by a missed shot, followed by another turnover, and then he did absolutely nothing on the defensive end. If it were me, I would have benched him. I hate you, Finley.

I hate you, Steve Kerr. I hate you more than any person who has ever played for the Spurs. You suck at being an announcer, too.

423

First, my French Horn instructor, Brigette, turned 24 today. She's awesome!

Today was OK. I'm not feeling too well, but I was well enough to play ball this afternoon.

We played some 3 on 3. We lost. It makes me mad a little bit. I feel like I should have taken charge. I hit some big shots, and I made some good passes, but it could have been better. Then we played a game of 25. Ryan should have won it, but I got the hot hand.

I have homework due tomorrow. I have a load of laundry in the dryer. I'm hoping to be done by midnight. I really want more sleep. I'm drained. I did fall asleep at around 12:30AM last night, and I woke up at 7:30AM this morning like always. 7 hours isn't too bad. I like more, but I'll take it.

I really like this Queens of the Stone Age CD. The tracks I'm listening to are:

Burn The Witch
Little Sister
I Never Came
The Blood Is Love
"You Got A Killer Scene There, Man..."

I need to listen to the others more.

This morning was interesting. I got two looks before I got to my first class. Made me happy. But just to be sure, I went to a bathroom to look in a mirror and make sure there was nothing on my face. There wasn't.

Alright, for the mean time, that's all I've got. If my laundry takes a while, I'll write again later tonight.

422

So yea, didn't fall asleep until 2AM. Woke up at 7:30AM like usual. Was on campus until 4PM. And no, I didn't take a nap when I got home. So, I should be extremely tired for tonight, which is great. I could really use some decent sleep.

It's been so bad, that even in my dreams I'm looking for a bed to sleep in. Anyone else ever experience that? Dreaming about laying down in bed with the lights off and trying to sleep?

Woke up this morning, but I really didn't want to. Then I remembered that I have a Spanish test. So I had to go. The second half of the test is tomorrow. I'm not planning on studying between right now and 10AM, so oh well. Then I should be sticking around campus to get some playing time in. I need to double check with Ryan that it's still on.

Oh, tomorrow the West Wing is on. Crap. I need to be home by 8PM then. Which means I need to leave campus by 7PM. Crap. That only leaves an hour if we start at 5:45PM. Well, an hour and 15 minutes. Not enough time. Damnit.

Good, he wants to start at 5PM. So, that gives me 2 hours to whoop his sorry behind. Well, unless we play teams and he's on my team. If that's the case, we'll win. I understand his game and he understands mine.

Either way, time for me to get some sleep. I'm aiming for 9 hours, if possible.

421

Can't sleep.

Can't stop thinking.

And it's only Monday. I mean, Tuesday.

This is going to be a really, really long week.

And if I could give up, I would. I'd walk away in a second without looking back. But it's too late.

OK, I hope that gives me a little peace of mind. I need to sleep.

420

So, I was up until 1:30AM last night working on that damn program. Then I woke up at 7:30AM this morning 'cause I had to shave and what not. Needless to say, I was completely on autopilot through my classes.

I got home at 1PM. I turned on my computer, wrote a post, and then I decided that it was time for a nap. At 1:30PM, I turned on WinAmp, turned on my Harmon/Kardon, put on my headphones, and passed out. I slept until 5PM. That's when Ryan called me for some ball up at campus. But he wanted to start at 5:45PM, and I figured there was no way I was going to get ready and get there in time to play. So I told him I'd stay on campus Wednesday to get some ball in. Haven't played ball with him since the last IM game. I didn't put on a show there, so I need to reassure him that I'm still the man to beat in our group.

Watched the championship game. I'm not the biggest fan of college basketball. The 3-point line does need to be moved back, and I really feel the shot clock needs to be shortened. 35 seconds is way too long. I'd be happy enough if they cut it down to 30 seconds. I'd be ecstatic if they cut it down to 24 seconds.

But it was a great game. Fun to watch.

There's something I want to mention about the previous post. Meh...nevermind.

Either way, think I'm going to watch some Venture Brothers and head to bed. I just know I'm not going to sleep early considering I took a near 5 hour nap.

419

One time, I wasn't nice to someone. And it was at a time when this person needed me to be understanding and compassionate.

Instead, I thought about how that person betrayed me. Those thoughts prevented me from doing the right thing.

And to this day I regret it.

That's why I'm nice.

But everyone I know gives me other reasons to be nice. So it's not like the above is the only reason.

418

I went crazy on this program. Really, really crazy.

I'm about 10 minutes away from finishing it.

Notice the time. 12:01AM. It was due at 11:59PM. Damnit.

I can turn it in today, the 4th, by 11:59PM for 80% of its value if I get everything right. Better than nothing I suppose. But I'm still pissed. I've been typing away for the last 3 hours straight, and 3 hours before that. Then you can add on whatever amount of time I spent on it yesterday.

Not to mention that I watched the Mavs lose. Ok, they didn't lose. They got their ass handed to them. The really pulled it together in the 3rd, but damnit, they just decided to stop playing. Pathetic.

Alright, so I'm going to go to bed in a super pissed off mood. Yea!

417

I hate Daylight Savings. I really do.

Exactly what I was thinking...

"Oh, I still have 22 hours to do this program. Sweet. Wait, minus 9 hours for sleep. And minus 1 hour to wake up, shower, etc. Oh, they're airing the Mavs game, so that's minus about 2 1/2 hours. And my bro wanted to play basketball, so that's another 2 hours. So that leaves about 7 1/2 hours to do this thing. What?! 'Spring forward?' Man, that's another hour gone. Damnit, the whole world is against me."

So yea, this sucks.

But hey, at least I did a majority of the work earlier today. Honestly, I should only have to spend 3 more hours on it. And I really don't think that's going to happen. Damn.

Either way, it's an hour later than it should be, and I need to get some sleep.

416

Maybe I should elaborate more on what I was talking about in the last post. If you're tired of reading about her, by all means, ignore the next couple of paragraphs.

We had our usual fun in lab. Laughed about some stuff like always. Had our walk like always.

I didn't go through with my plan. I know, that makes me a big wuss. And that's fine, I can take the name calling. (Brandon called me something a little more graphic.) So, after CS, I walked to my spot near my next class and called Brandon. I told him how it all went down. Just about 2 minutes into it, I see her walk by. So I pause, tell Brandon I'll call him back, and I call her to make sure I saw the right person and not a look-a-like.

Had another conversation with her. Went well. We could talk for hours. Once we start, it just flows naturally. Either way, at the end I understood that I need to pick up the phone and call people (specifically her) more often.

You see, I have a problem with calling people. I had a bad experience once, and since then I just can't get the courage to dial numbers. That was back in the Winter of 2000. So, for roughly 51 months I have had a fear of calling people. I don't want to call someone and hear "I'm busy, can I call you back?" That exact phrase. So if you wonder why I never call you, that's why.

At least with text messages if the other person is busy, I don't have to hear, "Can I text you later?"

And yes, I do mean fear. Top of the list. For comparison, the second thing on my list is heights. And I've been on the Tower of Terror.

So, I have this project to do, and I haven't started on it yet. Forgive me if I don't post for the next 30 hours or so. I'll try. No promises.

415

I figured out why I'm so interested in her. And why I'm not sure about her.

I can't get a read on her.

You know how in poker there are 'tells' that give away what a player is doing. For instance, one might scratch his left ear when he's bluffing. Something like that. When you catch on, the game becomes much easier.

Well, I can't read her. And I would like to think that I'm good at this. Usually within minutes I can figure out when a chic is genuinely happy and the different signals that give away when she's just putting on a show.

Her 'I don't know' and such are confusing to me. With most chics, I know whether 'I don't know' is a yes or a no. But her's...all it tells me is that she does know.

I've met my match. Someone who breaks down my methods. Scary.

Either way, here comes a boring weekend filled with programming.

Oh, and thinking last night only deprived me of 30 minutes. I made up for it this afternoon with a 2 hour nap.