Truthfully

I wonder if I come off as being judgmental. I notice that when certain people say things that might be offensive/controversial/unexpected, they look at me for a reaction. I try not to give one to them. I don't care what you've done in the past, and I don't care about your personal information, so long as you treat me right presently.

I don't think I'm difficult to get along with. Because I don't speak much, I don't really offend anyone. I don't start arguments, and I try to avoid confrontations if at all possible. I'll be the first to give in just to stop a debate.

I know what my flaws are though. I never call anyone. I never initiate any conversations.

Everytime I feel like calling someone, I get this thought in my head that they might be busy. They might not want to talk with me. If everyone in the world thought that way, there'd be no use for any communication device, I know. I'm just very shy. I'd rather miss out on a great conversation than call someone and hear, "Let me call you back later," or "I'm kind of busy." I know exactly why, but that's an issue I don't want to dive into.

And I think it's this mentality that's killing me right now. I can't break out of it. I'm sorry.