Bad Thursday?

I know I said I'd be back on Monday. But I am just overfilled with thoughts that need to get out.

I'm really in the mood to destroy things. I finished most of my logic homework, but the 2nd to last problem is killer. Well, maybe I'm just making it harder than what it is.

When I'm on the bus, and I get my favorite seat, I look at the metal and plastic right in front of me. I want to hit it with my forearms until either my bones or that metal and plastic give. But I know that will hurt immensely. And I know my Dad would be pissed at me for something stupid like that. Ok, well maybe not pissed, but he wouldn't be happy. The whole knuckle incident is proof of that.

Today's been rough. I've been freaked out, surprised in a bad way, shocked in another, apalled, disgusted, you name it. Today is not my day. But at least there's less than 2 hours left.

I can't help but feel that in two hours, everything can go wrong. Even if I went to sleep right this moment. There's no guarantee that I'll wake up happy. No promise that I'll wake up without fear.

Wishing I was having another bone marrow test...

...just so I could be sedated. Sedated, seduced, either works...